Rachael: so you think [Jim and Pam] fucked after the dinner?
Beth: i do. but that's just me. i think they fucked all night long, and then he made her pancakes.
Rachael: that would be amazing
Beth: yeah any girl who fucks me all night gets pancakes, it's a policy.
Rachael: loololol
Beth: lol
Beth: so the question becomes how have I remained single for almost 5 weeks?!
Rachael: i have no idea.
Beth: answer: no one knows about the pancakes.
Rachael: LOLOLOL
Beth: LOL
Rachael: i think this is a huge factor
Rachael: you should make a t shirt
Rachael: fuck me all night and i'll make you pancakes
Beth: LOLOLOL
Rachael: i think you'll find the amount of people hitting on you would grow exponentially
Beth: this is a brilliant idea.

I don't even know what to say.

I'm stressed to the breaking point.

You can find my fanfic at houseketeers.

Feel free to add me. Comment to be added.

OMG DID I JUST SEE AMY ADAMS AND KRISTEN WIIG SINGING LOATHING FROM WICKED? THAT WAS SO CLOSE TO MY WILDEST WET DREAM COME TRUE *FLAIL*

In a fit of epic fail, this freezes so the preview image appears to be my beloved girls next door, who are not at all the point of this vid. Watch it even though you see them there. It's a stand up bit about nerds and pornography.

I'm thinking of changing my username to distance myself from House MD. What do we think of lj user plumerias? Plumeria is taken unfortunately. Can you think of a cooler varient than Plumerias?



These are plumerias. It's my favorite flower and I have a tattoo of it on my ankle.

The only reason I haven't already done it is I want to talk it over with Tasha and Rachael and they're both out. I've probably already done enough damage today doing things without getting any outside input first. *facepalm*

My major hesitation from choosing Plumerias is that I've always used plumeria as the plural form as well, and I'm not sure that isn't correct. Like criteria is the plural of criterion? I don't know.

Car alarm has been going off for fucking 4 hours.




That thing is not gonna help secure your car when I throw a brick through your fucking windshield.

Quiz: Sex Toy or Baby Toy?

I got 2 out of 15 y'all. Not an easy game.

It's not exactly the best time to come down with something.




I severely hope I'm wrong about this impending cold.

Smart, cool people accidently said "Walmart is evil" in my recent LJ post. I'm sure they meant to say something more clever and well-reasoned, because I know they are smart, and cool, and that "Walmart is evil" is the intellectual equivalent of me saying "People who say Walmart is evil are ignorant sluts." Both statements are absolutely false.

Walmart is providing jobs to Americans and foreign workers who want and need them. Evidence: they won't or can't get better jobs.

Walmart is saving me thousands of dollars a year. THOUSANDS.

If you think that your walmart cashier is doing work that is so deserving of additional benefits (which are obviously simply the equivalent of higher pay) I'd advise you to leave a generous tip when you checkout.

No? You need that money? You can think of a more deserving local charity? So does Walmart. So can Walmart. Walmart makes aproximately 4% profit. Walmart donated over 170 million dollars in 2004.

The world is not perfect, and I'm sure Walmart isn't either. However, there are thousands if not millions of people who are giving their family a higher standard of living than they otherwise could, thanks to thier job producing products or services for Walmart, or thanks to the savings they accrue from shopping at Walmart. If Walmart wasn't a positive force for America, it wouldn't be profitable. Walmart is fabulous.

If you still disagree, read this and then make an articulate, logical response in your LJ.

"I've already been to heaven. After five minutes I was like...let's go."

Do you have an inclination for BDSM? created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Bondage The act of being bound or binding someone is what gets you going. It could be the desire for control or the lack thereof. Luckily, there are plenty of ways to explore this in that most adult stores offer plenty of tools for such a fetish. As far as fetishes go this one tends to be one of the more popular. Switch 89% Bondage 89% Experimental 79% Submission 71% Domination 68% Masochism 57% Degradation 54% Sadism 50% Exhibitionism and Voyeurism 39% Vanilla Sex 29%

I have just realized that there are 13 days until my first final. My LJ and tv-that-is-not-new-House-MD priveleges have been revoked.

I will miss you.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY sonnydaman!!!

I don't think your fic will be finished in time. Just know that law school is hard and I'm working on it.

Here is a video of magicly gorgeous fish doing some kind of display. You can hear me asking Tasha about it and her teaching me things. She's so smart.

Me, making a cell phone call in Panera, and most likely scaring the squares:

Hi. I see you're just down the street from me. Do you guys carry ball gags? Lovely. What are your hours? Oh, wow, that's fabulous. Ok thanks for your help I'll be in tonight.

Suggesting we meet at 10 on Sunday for coffee to study and thus dragging me from my bed at least two hours early had already put you on thin ice. That you are 20 minutes late (and counting) has me in a mild rage.