Houseketeer

Thoughts on the Office.

Tue, 22 Apr 2008 05:33:37 GMT

Rachael: so you think [Jim and Pam] fucked after the dinner?
Beth: i do. but that's just me. i think they fucked all night long, and then he made her pancakes.
Rachael: that would be amazing
Beth: yeah any girl who fucks me all night gets pancakes, it's a policy.
Rachael: loololol
Beth: lol
Beth: so the question becomes how have I remained single for almost 5 weeks?!
Rachael: i have no idea.
Beth: answer: no one knows about the pancakes.
Rachael: LOLOLOL
Beth: LOL
Rachael: i think this is a huge factor
Rachael: you should make a t shirt
Rachael: fuck me all night and i'll make you pancakes
Beth: LOLOLOL
Rachael: i think you'll find the amount of people hitting on you would grow exponentially
Beth: this is a brilliant idea.

Dumped.

Mon, 24 Mar 2008 01:12:24 GMT

I don't even know what to say.

Sun, 23 Mar 2008 04:41:47 GMT

I'm stressed to the breaking point.

FANGASM

Sun, 09 Mar 2008 04:44:48 GMT

OMG DID I JUST SEE AMY ADAMS AND KRISTEN WIIG SINGING LOATHING FROM WICKED? THAT WAS SO CLOSE TO MY WILDEST WET DREAM COME TRUE *FLAIL*

The final frontier?

Wed, 27 Feb 2008 08:31:55 GMT

In a fit of epic fail, this freezes so the preview image appears to be my beloved girls next door, who are not at all the point of this vid. Watch it even though you see them there. It's a stand up bit about nerds and pornography.

New Username?

Fri, 11 Jan 2008 23:51:09 GMT

I'm thinking of changing my username to distance myself from House MD. What do we think of lj user plumerias? Plumeria is taken unfortunately. Can you think of a cooler varient than Plumerias?

These are plumerias. It's my favorite flower and I have a tattoo of it on my ankle.

The only reason I haven't already done it is I want to talk it over with Tasha and Rachael and they're both out. I've probably already done enough damage today doing things without getting any outside input first. *facepalm*

My major hesitation from choosing Plumerias is that I've always used plumeria as the plural form as well, and I'm not sure that isn't correct. Like criteria is the plural of criterion? I don't know.

lmao

Wed, 19 Dec 2007 17:09:44 GMT

I know I'll be downloading the free mp3 version.

Rant of the Day

Thu, 13 Dec 2007 00:02:36 GMT

Car alarm has been going off for fucking 4 hours.

That thing is not gonna help secure your car when I throw a brick through your fucking windshield.

Instead of studying, I'm

Sun, 09 Dec 2007 19:26:56 GMT

Quiz: Sex Toy or Baby Toy?

I got 2 out of 15 y'all. Not an easy game.

OH. FUCK.

Sat, 08 Dec 2007 17:36:44 GMT

It's not exactly the best time to come down with something.

I severely hope I'm wrong about this impending cold.

Walmart is Fabulous. STFU.

Sun, 02 Dec 2007 15:50:47 GMT

Smart, cool people accidently said "Walmart is evil" in my recent LJ post. I'm sure they meant to say something more clever and well-reasoned, because I know they are smart, and cool, and that "Walmart is evil" is the intellectual equivalent of me saying "People who say Walmart is evil are ignorant sluts." Both statements are absolutely false.

Walmart is providing jobs to Americans and foreign workers who want and need them. Evidence: they won't or can't get better jobs.

Walmart is saving me thousands of dollars a year. THOUSANDS.

If you think that your walmart cashier is doing work that is so deserving of additional benefits (which are obviously simply the equivalent of higher pay) I'd advise you to leave a generous tip when you checkout.

No? You need that money? You can think of a more deserving local charity? So does Walmart. So can Walmart. Walmart makes aproximately 4% profit. Walmart donated over 170 million dollars in 2004.

The world is not perfect, and I'm sure Walmart isn't either. However, there are thousands if not millions of people who are giving their family a higher standard of living than they otherwise could, thanks to thier job producing products or services for Walmart, or thanks to the savings they accrue from shopping at Walmart. If Walmart wasn't a positive force for America, it wouldn't be profitable. Walmart is fabulous.

If you still disagree, read this and then make an articulate, logical response in your LJ.

House 4x09

Wed, 28 Nov 2007 02:58:12 GMT

Bloody vomit makes Beth wish she was watching My Little Ponies instead. Or Rainbow Brite. Do you guys remember Rainbow Brite? She had a horse as well. OH it's back on.

HE READ IT ONLINE. I love it. Also I love Cuddy's blouse. Lemme borrow that top. What are you saving it for?

Mmm I still love when House and Cameron are in the same room. I think they're screwing offscreen.

OMG I LOVE POINTS. THAT IS SO HOT.

House just called CTB Amber. I think that means she's gone.

I never noticed that Wilson has a teddybear and golf trophies.

"If he had a history of shoving cancer into his veins..." LMAO O2 TANK.

LOLZ LABCOAT. HOUSE IS SO SEXY TONIGHT.

"You can still use those if you're alive." This guy can sue Wilson on a reliance theory. Promissory Estoppel on Wilson's promise he would die. I wonder if that would work. House is probably right that he can't recover for the plane tickets.

Kutner; Kumar. Kumar; Kutner. They should have just named him Kumar.

"That's your role in the game." Smart point about the labcoat.

Addict guy is kinda pretty. I like the smeared eye-liner look on boys.

That Honda ad made me REALLY want chocolate milk.

ZOMG TERMINATOR TV SHOW?! I HAS EXCITE.

Amber should totally know that by now she is not gonna win points by indulging in stereotypes. I don't like Amber. "How is my willingness to do anything to get the right answer bad for my patients?" House is looking in a mirror. Please PLEASE don't hire Amber.

A profit seeking entity released this?

"There's no negligence without injury." OKAY HOUSE I LOVE YOU. Of course there is an injury here, the $6000 loss on the now useless sale of the house. But there's not really negligence here because Wilson's not at fault for the loss. The best claim is in contract law, promissory estoppel, like I said before.

PIANO = HOTNESS.

Oh Foreman. How do you be so short?

Mmmm House/13 moments.

"I think it would be wrong to take so little money from you." The lolz. Suing because he's living. "Have you spoken to a lawyer?" Wilson is right, settling for $6000 was the best result that guy could hope for.

I hope that whatever the fuck this guy has it's not as anti-climactic as last week. I feel like lately the medical mysteries have been too back-seat to House's staffing issues.

Arby's has cheesecake poppers? Since it's the thought that counts, Tasha I would take you to Arby's tomorrow if I was there.

"I've heard that not all lawyers are as ethical as the ones we see on TV." HAHA HOUSE IS GIVING OUT FREE LEGAL ADVICE. He knows just enough about the law to screw this guy over.

The sound a trash compactor makes when you crawl inside it. I love this show. Is he seizing or dancing?

My brother called me and I missed part. AMBER AND 13 GOT FIRED? THAT'S SO DUMB. HOW CAN THERE NOT BE A GIRL? I'M GOING TO STOP WATCHING THIS SHOW.

ok that's satisfactory then. i stll say Cuddy is a sexist pig, because her reasons for wanting a woman are NOT so that House can make sweet sweet love to her.

Today could use a little ridiculous.

Fri, 09 Nov 2007 15:42:02 GMT

"I've already been to heaven. After five minutes I was like...let's go."

As seen at Dragynflies

Wed, 07 Nov 2007 05:57:42 GMT

Do you have an inclination for BDSM?
created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Bondage

The act of being bound or binding someone is what gets you going. It could be the desire for control or the lack thereof. Luckily, there are plenty of ways to explore this in that most adult stores offer plenty of tools for such a fetish. As far as fetishes go this one tends to be one of the more popular.

Switch

89%

Bondage

89%

Experimental

79%

Submission

71%

Domination

68%

Masochism

57%

Degradation

54%

Sadism

50%

Exhibitionism and Voyeurism

39%

Vanilla Sex

29%

Hiatus

Tue, 06 Nov 2007 20:58:10 GMT

I have just realized that there are 13 days until my first final. My LJ and tv-that-is-not-new-House-MD priveleges have been revoked.

I will miss you.

Mon, 05 Nov 2007 03:37:49 GMT

HAPPY BIRTHDAY sonnydaman!!!

I don't think your fic will be finished in time. Just know that law school is hard and I'm working on it.

Dancing Fish

Sat, 03 Nov 2007 21:45:53 GMT

Here is a video of magicly gorgeous fish doing some kind of display. You can hear me asking Tasha about it and her teaching me things. She's so smart.

There is no business I won't transact in public...

Wed, 31 Oct 2007 19:48:26 GMT

Me, making a cell phone call in Panera, and most likely scaring the squares:

Hi. I see you're just down the street from me. Do you guys carry ball gags? Lovely. What are your hours? Oh, wow, that's fabulous. Ok thanks for your help I'll be in tonight.

Rant of the Day

Sun, 21 Oct 2007 14:20:55 GMT

Suggesting we meet at 10 on Sunday for coffee to study and thus dragging me from my bed at least two hours early had already put you on thin ice. That you are 20 minutes late (and counting) has me in a mild rage.

Teen Girl Squad!

Sat, 13 Oct 2007 07:59:37 GMT


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Please comment, credit, and don't hotlink.

Pretty fucking sweet meme

Fri, 12 Oct 2007 03:07:08 GMT

Saw at alternagirl

And with a pic from tonight:

Pushing Daisies

Mon, 08 Oct 2007 17:11:37 GMT

So Journeyman proved to be disappointing, and I began to think I wouldn't have a new show to obsess over this season. NOT SO! Pushing Daisies is amazing. You can watch it at abc.com. You SHOULD watch it at abc.com. Go now. I'll wait.

Amazing right? SO AMAZING. I love love love it. It has golden goddess Kristin Chenoweth, which is enough reason to watch it all by itself. BUT even better it has a delicious ship with my favorite little situation: they love each other desperately but there is nothing they can do about it. It's a very extreme case of it because unlike an employer/employee thing (Sam/Jack, House/Cameron, Mr. Grey/Lee, Danny/Jordan) he absolutely cannot physically touch her. And they are both SO FUCKING BEAUTIFUL. Ethereal inner light gorgeous.

At first I thought that would be a problem in the erotica department but my mind quickly found work-arounds. *kisses her dirty mind*

ned_and_chuck ♥ ned_and_chuck ♥ ned_and_chuck

Rant of the Day

Thu, 04 Oct 2007 01:00:26 GMT

FUCK YOUR MOTHER FUCKING FINAL, YOU BOW-TIE WEARING WASTE OF MY PRECIOUS TIME.

House 4x02

Wed, 03 Oct 2007 01:59:00 GMT

Oh good, it's a simulator. She's a liar. House'll love that.

I has a sad about 23. BOO.

BYE BYE ROW D. I WILL MISS YOU BBs! ok, no, ROW C. I WILL NOT MISS YOU.

"I discovered salt and invented FM radio."

"We're protecting Osama Bin Laden?" FTW.

39 - not bad.
13 - uh oh. she's good and I want 23.

18 - I approve.

I was just starting to like blondie when she quit. GOOD BOY 18! ILU BB!

ooo, i like dude in leather. he has to stay. HE HAS TO STAY.

OH BLONDIE. ILU. YOU CAN STAY.

PORPOISE PORN FTW. OKAY 13, YOU'RE GROWING ON ME.

"I ride alone."

Who's that?

Osama Bin Laden.

Ok, the hot guy is 10. 26 is also not bad. So I like 10, 39, 4, 13.

OK, I DON'T LIKE 10. HE TOLD CUDDY. I knew he'd be fired.

26 is so gone. Napping is not allowed.

OH COME ON. CELL PHONE. DON'T BE STUPID HOUSE. SHE'S THERE.

That "stressfull" line from Wilson was reaching. Lame writing.

"I like you number nine." (1) that pwns. (2) take that wilson.

18 is so in. SO IN.

13 is the medium drinker ftw. I love this.

You're an Athiest. "Only on Christmas and Easter."

LOLZ TO ALL HER DOCTORS BEING ON TEQUILA.

HOUSE AND I BOTH WANTED TO NAIL BARBARA FELDON. THAT MAKES US SOUL MATES.

39's plan for implants may give him the win. I approve of him. Until that moment I thought 6/9, 13, 18. Now I want 39.

"Would you condemn this woman to a life where people look at her face?"

LOLZ IMUNITY CHALLENGE.

HAHA CHASE! WB BB!

Ah, the rose ceremony.

YYYYYYYYYES to 26 being his "assistant." We just got a fourth duckling y'all. AND RACHAEL WAS RIGHT AND BETH WAS WRONG. No penalty for naps.

"The hair makes you look like a hooker. I like it."

I'm sorry I'm sick of know it all Cameron. IF YOU'RE SO SMART WHY AREN'T YOU FUCKING HIM HUH? HOUSE/13 FOREVAR.

Thu, 27 Sep 2007 20:52:11 GMT

In an effort to avoid yesterday's snafu (accidental five hour nap) I am chillaxing at Panera for the afternoon into evening, aiming to be home by nine for The Office. Who else is completely jazzed for The Office? We'll see if I actually get more done in a public place than I do in bed.

In case Michelle is interested in updates Professor C-E snuck out of the hospital to teach today, telling the nurse he was going outside to look at squirrels. That's devotion. I personally think the guys insane. But you have to love him.

Professor C-E on being hospitalized five days and counting for simply having diarreah:

The hospital is where these interns and young doctors get to test their muscle, and they are SO into their diagnosis. I said, 'Can't you just treat me? Stick a cork up there?' Oh, *noooo*. They need to know the cause. 'What is it?' they say. I'll show you the bowl and you can see what it IS.

I would do just about anything to get out of studying right now. I'm getting to it in increments, like just now I got the books out. There they are. Right there where I could read them. Next I'll open one to an appropriate page. Before you know it I'll be reading. Maybe.

Do you think they'll show the Jim/Pam date tonight? I need a Jim/Pam icon.

(I'm sorry about your migraine and I hope you had a nice nap. I missed you the entire time. Sorry about my bad form in allowing my cell battery to go empty. I'll be better next time. Love you.)


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